Thread: You Know You're from Maine If...

1. You’ve had arguments over the comparative quality of Fried Dough.
2. When it snows four inches you call it "a dusting."
3. Your neighbor's house was foreclosed after an unlucky 24 hour mini-cruise on the Scotia Prince.
4. You don't understand why there aren't fried clam shacks elsewhere in the county.
5. You know what an Irving is and the location of 15 of them.
6. You knew all the flavors at Perry's Nut House.
7. Your car is covered in yellow-green dust in May.
8. You can drive the Augusta traffic circle without slowing down.
9. You’ve hung out at a gravel pit.
10. You think a mosquito could be a species of bird.
11. You once skipped school and went to Bar Harbor, Old Orchard Beach or Reid State Park.
12. Even your school cafeteria made good chowder.
13. You’ve almost fallen asleep driving between Houlton and Presque Isle.
14. You know how to pronounce Calais.
15. You’ve made a meal out of a Jordan's red dye hot-dog, a bag of Humpty Dumpty potato chips and a can of soda.
16. You’ve gone to a Grange bean supper.
17. In high school, you (or a friend) packed Deering Ice Cream cones.
18. At least once in your life, a seagull pooped on your head.
19. At least once in your life you've said, "It smells like the mill in here."
20. There’s a fruit and vegetable stand within 10 minutes of your house.
21. You crave Italian sandwiches at least weekly.
22. Your idea of a traffic jam is being the second car at the stoplight.
23. You wonder out loud if the state can just close its borders to people from away.
24. Your house converts to a B&B every July & August for people from away that you happen to know.
25. All year long you're tracking sand in the house-from the beach in the summer and the roads and sidewalks in the winter.
26. You have a front door but no porch to get to it.
27. Your kids start using "wicked" as a multipurpose part of speech.
28. You have to have the sand cleaned out of your brake system every spring.
29. You do the majority of your shopping out of Uncle Henry's.
30. You’ve ditched the car on the side of the road somewhere because you thought you saw some good fiddleheads!
31. You’ve had a vacation from school just to help the family pick potatoes.
32. You know a lobster pot is a trap, not a kettle.
33. You know not to plant tender crops until the last full moon in May.
34. When you go to the dump and bring back more than you brought.
35. You’ve ever given directions to someone from "away" and intentionally led them in the opposite direction they wanted to go.
36. You watch "Murder she wrote" and snicker at the stupid fake accents.
37. You know how to find the rope swing at the quarry.
38. You take the New Hampshire toll personally.
39. You feel really really good when you cross the Piscatiqua River Bridge into Kittery.
40. You always wave when you see a Maine license plate in another state.
41. A roll of Duct tape and a can of flat black spray paint will get your car to pass inspection.
42. You know how to avoid all the traffic at the Fryeburg Fair by using the "Secret Entrance".
43. You have to replace you mailbox yearly because of the town plow.
44. You know how to get from Cumberland to Fryeburg via the "Egypt Road".
45. You can remember when the "Egypt Road" was a dirt track through the woods.
46. When you're supposed to dress up, you wear flannel with a tie.
47. You know that Moody's Diner does NOT take credit cards!
48. You actually miss the fifteen below zero mornings in winter (that have been eliminated by the greenhouse effect) because you enjoyed running or walking to work in the silent crystal stillness, punctuated by an idling car engine as the owner waited indoors for the car to warm up before his mad dash from warmth to warmth, and your lungs did not freeze; thank you very much for your concern.
49. The word "stove" refers to what you did to the right front fender of your truck after you've had a wicked bring-up on a rock.
50. There's too much "stuff" in your 2 "cah" garage to get either of your cars into it.
51. You know what a frappe is.
52. You know the smell of Woodsmens fly dope.
53. You eat supper at night and dinner at noon.

My Faves:

54. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
55. "Vacation" means going to Bangor for the weekend.
56. You measure distance in hours.
57. You know several people who have hit deer more than once.
58. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
59. You use a down comforter in the summer.
69. Your grandparents drive at 65 mph through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.
61. You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.
62. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave them both unlocked.
63. You think of the major food groups as deer meat, beer, fish and berries.
64. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
65. There are four empty cars running in the parking lot at the convenience store at any given time.
66. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
67. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
68. You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and flannel pajamas.
69. You know all four seasons: almost wintah, wintah, still wintah and construction.


and some more...

70. You own more than four pair of gloves.
71. Every other vehicle is a 4X4.
72. Camping is allowed it's only in steel sided campers.
73. When the sun goes down, you start looking for your coat.
74. In March your vehicle is 43% mud.
75. You leave your keys in your car and the next morning your car is still there.
76. You’re on the shoulder of the highway with your hood up and somebody stops to help you.
77. You can pay for six Big Macs with a personal check.
78. Drive by shootings only occur on the evening news.
79. Your central heating system is fueled by large logs.
80. You see numerous chauffeur-driven dogs.
81. You can see the stars at night.
82. People drive 100 miles to shop in a real mall.
83. A deer throws itself under your wheels.
84. You got a set of new snow tires for Valentines Day.
85. More than 1/2 the meat in your freezer is moose.
86. The term "chill factor" is part of your daily vocabulary.
87. The bumper jack in your pickup will lift a house.
88. You only paid $5 to cut down your own douglas fir Christmas tree.
89. You enjoy a hot chocolate more than you do a margarita.
90. A girl’s basketball game fills the school gym.
91. You put the car heater on your list of best friends.
92. You pawned a snow blower instead of a set of golf clubs.
93. If you and your friend across town complain about a skunk smell from a roadkill...and
it's the same skunk.
94. If, after you gassed up the Chevy, you realized your wallet was at home and you heard:
"Just stop by when you can."
95. If the only people who can afford a lobster dinner are the tourists.
96. If you spend your weekends "sailing" ..... garage "sale"ing.
97. If your "luxury vehicle" is a twelve-year-old rustbucket on wheels.
98. If your dog eats better than you do, and more often too.
99. If you never say what you paid for an item but how much you "give" for it.
100. If every time you get married, you still have the same in-laws!
101. If you ever used the word "some" to mean "very": [Hey, pa, that is some nice car you got!]
102. If you can most always write on your pick-up truck window with your finger.
103. If your wife weighs more than your pick-up.
104. If your best fancy dress is a formal gown, grandma's pearls and LL Bean boots.
105. If you can eat a frozen popsicle stick to warm up your mouth in the wintah.
106. If you can get to the store faster in the middle of a blizzard than in the middle of tourist season.
107. If you've ever had to snow blow your roof.
108. If you ask your sweetheart to be your wife and she answers "Ayuh!"
109. If your house was on fire and you only had time to save the wife or your chainsaw, you'd have to give it some thought.
110. If you share information about girl friends with friends, but not fishing locations.
111. If almost everything you need to survive the elements or repair the truck are always in back of the truck